Frankel is a recognized expert in the fields of workplace behavior and female empowerment, and the president of Corporate Coaching International. She shows that half of the American workforce is made up of women, and they still earn 76.5 cents to every dollar earned by men.

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Replete with examples from Ms. Frankel's consulting clients, this book gives practical, no-holds-barred evaluations of such behaviours as feeding people at the office, working too hard, asking questions instead of making statements, and "asking permission." That last was a revelation to me.

As Ms. Frankel points out, we are all raised in a society that says you should get proper approvals before taking a step---any step. But men learn when to ask and when to just go ahead. Men learn how to apply the rubric "It's easier to get forgiveness than to get permission." Ms. Frankel pointes out that children, not adults, ask for permission to do perfectly rational things. I had never considered how detrimental to my career the habit of asking permission had been. But I decided to give Ms. Frankel's suggestions a try. I went to my boss and said, "I cannot come in on Friday." My boss looked nonplussed. I was petrified, but proud. I had done it. I had Made A Statement instead of Seeking Approval. And he didn't demur. He said, "Okay," and we went on with the day.

If you are feeling frustrated by the glass ceiling, if you feel stuck and can't figure out why you can't get further in your career ambitions (and if you're a female), this book is definitely worth the investment. It opened my eyes to things I did that I never even thought about, things that presented an image of an incompetent child---not a competent, composed, and capable woman. My image is now improving, and yours can too.

117 of 128 found the following review helpful:

Sexual SabotageMar 17, 2004
By Joanna Daneman
How to undo years of socialization of gender roles while working in business? This is a dilemma that women are facing as they push on the glass ceiling. What if the glass ceiling were as much self-created as part of corporate culture? These are some of the issues that Lois Frankel attempts to address in "Nice Girls."

Her analysis of gender training (such as Nice Girls Aren't Loud) are pretty much what I heard as a child. Yet...what a delicate line women must walk, as being tough is interpreted as bitchiness instead of hard-headed business savvy. So here's the problem; Frankel advises worrying less about being liked, advises apologizing sparingly -- not profusely and frequently, but that isn't the same as permission to have a take-no-prisoners attitude. While occasionally being disliked is going to be hard on women who work cooperatively and not in a hierarchical manner, Frankel explains why niceness may short-circuit the path to a deserved top spot.

While Frankel's book has excellent advice about avoiding subtle but destructive body language and practices like apologizing and making declarative statements into questions, as well as failing to blow one's own horn as needed, there are other books that explain the male-dominated playing field such as "Hardball for Women." It's not enough to understand our own failures to mesh into a world where men pretty much make the rules, it's also important to understand the rules thoroughly. "Rules favor the rulemakers, and when they don't, the rules are changed." Look at the troubles of Carly Fiorina and the attitudes towards Martha Stewart to see some of the pitfalls that can trap someone while following the advice in Frankel's book without understanding all the rules or new rules of behavior.

106 of 117 found the following review helpful:

More Than Rosie the Riveter:Mar 17, 2004
By A.Trendl HungarianBookstore.com "What should I review next?"
Men are men. Women are women. Right? The matter of gender is easy enough to establish, but in Lois P. Frankel's book, "Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office: 101 Unconscious Mistakes Women Make That Sabotage Their Careers" we learn there are underlying mores and premises to follow if women want to be at the top of a company. These rules are unspoken, but Frankel demystifies the process by which some women hurt their success by playing into the cultural roles prescribed to them growing up.

Frankel presumes most women grew up in a home that oppresses women from growing up into full adults. What may have been true for 1954 is not as true today. However, her challenge is still with merit, and in 2004, it crosses the gender barrier. e men should be taking notes from Frankel. There are plenty of little boys among us who need to work as men.

"Rosie the Riveter" ads during WWII encouraged women into the workplace, but often as factory and shipyard works. There was no "Annie the Accountant" or "Sally the CEO" campaigns. Being all you can be means being more than you were as a child. Frankel helps show how women can be more than little girls in the office place, and garner success as a result.

It is important to note that as much as this is an important book for women who esteem to be seen as professional should read, men also should read it. Not every man has reached his potential, and some fall to the same problems, in a masculine variation, as do some women. Fear, exhibited through the lack of initiative and an overborne, unnecessary kindness, holds many people back.

Objective, straightforwardness is much of what Frankel asserts.

Being professional doesn't mean you need to convert into a stomping intimidator, but it does mean being firm, not wincing when rejection is forthcoming, and thinking about more than immediate relationships. It is about getting the job done well, in concert with others, but never becoming weak while doing it all. You have expertise. You have training. You have what it takes.

Although Frankel is a professional coach, her book itself shows a coach is not needed. You need to be in control of your career, without worrying about the next person. Retain your ethics, your integrity and your aplomb, but it is your job to lead the way through your professional life. No parents, no coach, no friends are responsible for this.

I fully recommend "Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office: 101 Unconscious Mistakes Women Make That Sabotage Their Careers"
by Lois P. Frankel. Follow it up with the classic Dale Carnegie book, "How To Win Friends And Influence People," to learn the other side of the professional relationship balance.

Anthony Trendl
editor, HungarianBookstore.com

33 of 35 found the following review helpful:

A useful guide if you can look past a few flawsNov 21, 2005
By Star "Personal Legend"
"Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office" is a very practical book for any woman interested in moving ahead in her career and getting what she deserves. It is not targeted at any particular segment but instead it contains a lot of helpful, no-nonsense advice no matter where you are in your career, whether you work for a company or have your own business. Even the most accomplished and successful women will undoubtedly find in it some useful suggestions that they can implement to be all the more effective.

The book is organized in a very structured manner. It contains the 101 mistakes, grouped into seven categories:
- How You Play the Game
- How You Act
- How You Think
- How You Brand and Market Yourself
- How You Sound
- How You Look
- How You Respond
At the beginning of the book, you are given an opportunity to take a self-assessment to determine which of these areas you are the strongest in, and where you have opportunities for improvement. That way, you can jump directly to the section where you received the lowest score and begin working from there.

Each of the 101 mistakes is described with specific examples, and followed by a list of suggestions and action items for how you can improve in this particular area. As you go down the list, you can mark the items that you want to work on to make it easy to create an action plan for improvement.

Overall, the style of the book is very direct and frank. The author has many years of career counseling experience, and it shows. She does not mince words in showing you ways in which you sabotage yourself and your success, and gives specific and actionable steps to overcome these limitations. The author also provides a number of reference materials for "further reading", so that if you have an interest in doing further work in a particular area, you can go to these books for more detailed help and strategies.

While I was skeptical at first about how much value I would get out of this book, I was pleasantly surprised to find a few things that I had not considered before. It was also helpful to read a number of things that I already knew I wanted to improve. The specific action items following each mistake are a great way to go from knowing where your limitations are to taking immediate steps to improve them. Having finished the book, I found myself going back and taking notes on the items that I wanted to work on. I now have a fairly comprehensive list of things that I want to tackle, and I'll be able to focus on them one at a time.

Although I really appreciated the value provided by this book, I was also turned off by a few things. As a woman in my late twenties, I felt that a lot of the language in this book smacked of 70s-era feminism. The book also feeds on a lot of women's insecurities, as if being a woman in itself puts you at an unfair disadvantage. I believe that there is a lot to say for the power of femininity, and frankly, advice like "your hair should get increasingly shorter as you get older" is plain ludicrous. (According to this logic, women in their 90s would need to all but shave their heads.) This brings to mind the unflattering images of 80s-era professional manners with masculine haircuts and man-suits. In addition to the feminist message, the tone of the book often came across as somewhat "stuffy" and I had to double-check a couple of times that this book was actually published in the 21st century and not in 1987.

While the tone of the book prevented me from enjoying it as much as I could have (which is why I did not give it five stars), the advice it delivers is definitely sound and on target, and therefore I would recommend it to any woman interested in building a successful career in business.

26 of 28 found the following review helpful:

A handy reference you won't keep in your office!Mar 30, 2004
By Dr Cathy Goodwin
We've had almost four decades of books on women and careers, so it's hard to offer something new. Much of what Frankel offers will seem familiar, yet she packages her advice in easy-to-take bullets. I recommend the book as a reminder -- something to keep reading even when you think you've learned it all, because we all forget.

Although all these tips seem worthwhile, implementing them can be tricky. How, for instance, do we stop being naive? And some mistakes are not only common to both men and women but also have become embedded in unhealthy corporate cultures. Take breaks, she says, and don't pinch company pennies...yet some companies play the "I can work longer than you" game of staying late for "face time," while others will criticize employees who follower her suggestion to call a cab service rather than wait for a bus. And I suspect that, even now, a woman's expenses and time may be scrutinized more than a man's, in some environments.

Frankel's best tips relate to communications: avoid explaining, don't couh statements as questions, don't sit on one foot (I hadn't thought of this one!) and don't tilt your head unless you're inviting openness. I must admit I get irritated with women (AND some men!) who preface questions with, "This is a dumb question, but..." or some other preamble. Just ask! And the networking tips shouldn't be missed, especially a rare example of how networking can save a career.

I was unnerved by the advice to avoid blindly obeying your boss. You can, as she says, end up in legal trouble by obeying a n illegal order. However, if you're in this situation, there's not much you can do and you probably have to leave. Going to your boss's boss, as Frankel suggests, must be done with the greatest care and preferably another offer in hand. Most people still get ahead by making the boss look good and if you can't do this, you probably have to move.

Then again, there are few absolutes in careers or anything else. Women can do worse than to keep this book at home -- not in the office, where one should display only a calm, confident self.

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