| | |  | Career Management Books | Home » » Dealing with People You Can't Stand: How to Bring Out the Best in People at Their Worst | | | | | | | Description: | | The international bestseller--more than 500,000 copies sold! With their 1994 international bestseller, Dealing with People You Can't Stand, Drs. Rick Brinkman and Rick Kirschner armed a civility-starved world with no-nonsense strategies for dealing with difficult people with tact and skill. Since then, cell phones, the Internet, voice mail, and other technological wonders designed to bring people closer together have only made it that much harder to avoid "people you can't stand;" even worse, they've also created exciting new ways for annoying people to realize their talent for being pains in the butt. Updated and revised for the digital age, this new edition of Brinkman and Kirschner's bestselling guide shows readers how to successfully combat the whiners, grenades, tanks, snipers, close-talkers, pedants, and other rude, crude, and inconsiderate people who can ruin your day at work, in stores, on the street, in restaurants, at the movies, in waiting rooms, by fax, phone, and E-mail, and in cyberspace. | | | Product Details: | | | Author:
| Dr. Rick Brinkman | | Paperback:
| 224 pages | | Publisher:
| McGraw-Hill | | Publication Date:
| February 27, 2002 | | Language:
| English | | ISBN:
| 0071379444 | | Product Length:
| 9.07 inches | | Product Width:
| 6.05 inches | | Product Height:
| 0.61 inches | | Product Weight:
| 0.76 pounds | | Package Length:
| 8.98 inches | | Package Width:
| 5.98 inches | | Package Height:
| 0.71 inches | | Package Weight:
| 0.79 pounds | | Average Customer Rating:
|  based on 55 reviews |
| | | | Customer Reviews: | |
Average Customer Review:
 ( 55 customer reviews )
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Most Helpful Customer Reviews
125 of 128 found the following review helpful:
 The best conflict book for managers PERIODNov 19, 2002
By Mark A. Horstman
If you're a manager and have to deal with the day to day complaints and conflicts of a workplace, this is the best book I've read about it, without question.
I'm a leadership consultant and my firm spends a lot of time mediating conflicts and facilitating meetings where I have to get people on the same page. I have formal training in negotation, and mediation, and all that other more formal stuff. And a lot of it works. But the question I get asked over and over again is "what do I do when the conflict doesn't justify outside assistance? What about the DAY TO DAY conflicts - one of my people refuses to bend her schedule, another won't come in on time, another won't try to work with a sister department, my boss won't give me the resources I need." Well, this is that book. It lays out a simple concept of conflict (other people see things differently from you and therefore act differently), and then does something that SO FEW of the other books do: it tells you exactly what to say and how to say it. I have had my fill of books which tell me to "be nice" or "work towards a compromise". My response is, I know that, but how do I DO that? How do I keep the other person from popping off at me? THIS BOOK does that. It's simple - exactly right for line managers with DAY to DAY conflicts.
72 of 73 found the following review helpful:
This Book Changed my career (for the better!)Mar 08, 2000
By Eric Leberg
I'm a felony probation officer. I deal with difficult people. I applied the clear techniques provided with an offender described for years as "a real nasty guy...." by previous probation officers. The technique worked immediately, the man expressed appreciation saying "You are the first person in your department who ever understood me...I'll do exactly what you told me to do." I could relate scores of other times these techniques have helped over the years. Rick & Rick's set of tapes is also extremely helpful. You won't be sorry you learned this stuff.
105 of 111 found the following review helpful:
A book that really helps!May 14, 2001
By DocRossow
This is the finest book I've read on handling difficult people. As a training director for a large company, I've read many books on this subject, and trained interpersonal skills for years. This book is the CLEAREST, most practical book on the subject. The ten types of difficult people are now in my vocabulary, and help me instantly size up a situation so I can handle it better. The authors detail practical steps to take with each style, making it easier to increase your confidence in difficult situations. Most of all the authors encourage the reader to change his or her behavior, and the last chapter even offers the idea of the reader being a difficult person, in order to further reinforce the skills that this book teaches. A real winner, and a book that has helped my career and my sanity.
41 of 41 found the following review helpful:
I'll Never See Anyone Or Any Relationship In The Same WayAug 10, 2000
By JimG
While I judge the title to be a bit dramatic the information in this book has had a profound, dramatic effect on my life. I have approached the subject matter from the perspective that I'm in control of my relationships, and I can choose my own reactions to someone else's behavior. My own pettiness, as well other poeple's, was dictating some of my behavior, my attitudes, and some decisions too (sometimes badly). Yes, I see myself in some of those 10 personality traits described in the book. I wanted to be free of that nonsense, as well learn ways to have a good relationship with most anyone. This book's value to me has been to help me rise above the daily situations I encounter by helping me see human personality in a structured way. So that I can deliberately behave, react, and interact with people in positive, productive ways. I've been able to find peace with personalities that I've despised. I've found helpful information on how to get along with people who I hadn't a clue otherwise. If you're curious about finding solutions to working with, living with or next door to, or just finding peaceful ways to be around difficult people I recommend this book. I thought so much of this book I sent a copy of this book to a peer. This isn't about short term solutions to heated situations (customer service). This is about building trust and solid foundations with people with whom you have a longer term relationship (longer than 3 to 10 minutes) of some nature. Best wishes.
31 of 32 found the following review helpful:
Most Helpful Guide I've FoundOct 18, 2001
I was giving a workshop for people who were starting or re-entering the workforce for a graduate program in mental health. I did extensive research in our extensive school library, including books and periodicals. This was, by far, the most useful source of information that I found. It would be useful for anyone from an entry level worker to a top executive. It identifies the 10 "most difficult" types of people, and gives clear, step-by-step strategies for dealing with them. It also gives general advice for better communications. The advice is profound, yet written so anyone can understand, with narrative examples of the difficult behaviors.
My workshop was very successful, and I highly recommend this book.
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